Weddings in South Africa are an intriguing fusion of ancient customs and modern celebrations. Here’s a guide to beautiful marriage traditions in SA and its various communities.
One of the world’s most beautiful countries is without a doubt South Africa, which is located in the southernmost part of Africa.
Often shortened as SA, the economy of South Africa is a mixed economy, emerging market, and upper-middle-income economy, one of only eight such countries in Africa, Wikipedia reports. “The economy is the most industrialized, technologically advanced, and diversified economy in Africa,” the outlet adds.
The country is renowned for its varied topography, great natural beauty, and cultural diversity, all of which have made the country a favored destination for travelers since the legal ending of apartheid in 1994.
But beyond its natural beauty, South Africa has an extensive coastline, with a wide selection of beaches being awarded a ‘Blue Flag’ and it is also accepted as one of the world’s prime scuba diving locations.
Fortunately for you, this nature could work to your advantage if you have found the love of your life. In this article, JanaTribe will delve into the captivating traditions that make South African weddings unique, bridging the gap between the past and the present.
Why South Africa: A Timeless Canvas for Weddings
With its varied landscapes and lively cultural diversity, South Africa stands out as a destination unmatched for weddings. The backdrop of the nation is extraordinary, ranging from the golden beaches along the coast to the gorgeous highlands and savannahs. Couples can exchange vows in a variety of historical and modern settings here beneath the African sun, weaving a tapestry of memories that are entwined with the rich cultural legacy of the country.
South African traditional weddings, like those in other African nations, mostly rely on customs and rituals. These traditions are deeply ingrained in the local culture and have been passed down through the generations. Once you understand why these customs have been followed by families and couples for hundreds of years, it becomes much easier to understand (and honor) them.
South Africa is a cultural melting pot where each group has managed to hold onto its unique customs and ways of life. The rites and celebrations surrounding weddings all throughout the country are a magnificent reflection of this diversity. South African weddings are a wonderful fusion of traditional traditions and contemporary festivities, whether it is through the exuberant dances, the lavish costumes, or the poignant ceremonies.
If you’re planning a wedding and want to honor your South African heritage—or if you’ve been invited to a South African wedding and want to find out what you can expect—you might have questions about some of these traditions and how you can best honor them.
Here are some common traditions that revolve around weddings in South Africa as well as a breakdown of what some wedding experts have said on everything you’ll need to know before you celebrate.
A brief history of the traditions that make South African weddings truly unique.
South African weddings offer an enthralling trip through time and culture, from historic unions steeped in custom to contemporary events that combine legacy with modern flair. Even if marriage has changed throughout time, the core of South African wedding customs still tells a story of love, harmony, and ethnic diversity.
South African weddings feature a lot of joyful celebrating, which expert Dustin Sitar, CEO of The Groom Club says can include everything from exchanges of Zulu beaded rings, a practice that originated with the Zulu people and symbolizes the commitment of two families to come together, to specialized dances. “The Kupe dance is also a common tradition in South African weddings, where guests gather in a circle and perform an elaborate dance of celebration.” These traditions have carried on over the years in the hopes that they will help the two families merge into a stronger family unit while keeping bad luck and evil forces at bay.
Pre-marriage traditions in South Africa
Like in other parts of the world, two adult South Africans who believe that their bonds can grow beyond friendship status propose to each other and formally become engaged. Various settings in South Africa represent the start of a new chapter in your relationship, one that will knock your spouse off their feet if you pop the question., click here to check out 25 places you can propose to your lover in SA.
There are a lot of traditions that prelude the wedding ceremony. In a typical South African traditional marriage, the celebration starts long before the guests arrive at the ceremony. Below are some of the traditions in South African weddings.
Proposal Letters
Proposal letters are the first of many practices that are customary before Zulu marriages, according to Wedbuddy. The bride and her family are the recipients of these letters from the groom and his family. The first letter specifies the date of the Lobola negotiation as well as the couple’s decision to get married.
In response, the bride’s family writes a letter confirming or amending the Lobola negotiation date. These letters might have complex decorations and beautiful frames. A proposal letter custom is also prevalent in several other African nations and groups.
Lobola (Bride Wealth)
In many South African communities, the concept of lobola plays an important role in traditional weddings. Lobola (which means Knocking or Kokoobo in Ghana) is a dowry or bride wealth paid by the groom’s family to the bride’s family as a gesture of respect, commitment, and the merging of two families.
Negotiation can also occur before the payment. That negotiation is done by members of the family who are not the parents of the intended couple.
The bride’s price may be paid in money, animals, food, tools, clothing, or a combination of different valuable items.
Often, the bride price helps the couple start their new life and pay for the wedding. It also signifies the groom’s ability to provide for his bride.
The Umabo Ceremony
Umabo is a beloved traditional Zulu wedding that symbolizes the bride’s passage from girlhood to adulthood. Wearing a blanket her mother gave her, the bride leaves the house first thing in the morning. The bride will move into her new family home accompanied by her father, her family, relatives, and friends. The groom’s family house will serve as the ceremony’s location.
Pots, blankets, and other household necessities that the bride will need for her new home are given to her by her family during the traditional wedding. It involves taking beer or other libations (typically Amazulu) from one home to another while singing and dancing to songs to encourage joyousness between both families.
During this event, the community comes together to honor the bride and bless her future union. Gifts such as money or clothing can also be exchanged between families as well.
The Bride’s Washing Ceremony
The bride’s washing ceremony is seen as one last chance for the family to bond with the bride before she takes on her new role as a wife in her husband’s family home. “The bride’s mother or close female relatives will wash away all ill feelings with warm water, olive oil, or herbs symbolizing cleansing and protection from any bad luck associated with the wedding,” according to TheKnot.
Workout Session
John Anderson, Co-Founder and Executive Editor of Life Line Wedding says that a new tradition that is rising in popularity with people celebrating in South Africa is a combined workout session. “It could include anything from running together along the beachfront to going on bike rides around town together—it’s whatever suits them best!”
Imbeleko
Imbeleko is an earlier pre-wedding tradition. This is where offerings are made to ancestors for blessing.
Isigqibo
Isigqibo is also another SA wedding tradition which simply is an exchange of cows between families.
Dherela Amadoda
Also, Dherela Amadoda is a tradition where males from both sides convene for drinks at each other’s respective homes or a hall or public venue.
Traditional Blessing
Before the ceremony even starts, families often come together days before the wedding celebration for a traditional blessing that typically includes prayer, singing, and food shared amongst friends and family members who come out to show their support for the soon-to-be newlyweds. This blessing strengthens bonds between families too when members put aside generational differences momentarily as they all wish well upon this union of two lives entwined in love.
Flag raising
A few weeks before a wedding celebration is due to happen, the community raises a flag over the gate of the homes of the families involved. This flag lets passersby know that a wedding will occur in the area soon.
Bridal Shower
Traditionally known by different names like “Hlamuza” or “bachelor party,” bridal showers are an important way to not only celebrate but to bless the couple with a lifelong commitment through playing wedding games like “Fikamoya ka Nyama”—which is a guessing game.
South African Wedding Ceremony Traditions
Most South African weddings typically last around five hours but can range anywhere from three hours to three days, depending on specific traditions honored. Revelers can pack a lot of fun into those hours with several traditional ceremony practices.
The Anointing of Hands
The symbolic act of anointing the couple’s hands with holy oil during the wedding ceremony is known as the “anointing of hands,” which has its roots in Christian traditions. This ceremony represents the blessings placed upon their hands as tools of love and service, as well as the dedication of their union.
The Blessing of the Rings
Some South African wedding rites involve a specific blessing of the rings, given by an elder or spiritual leader, before the exchanging of rings. Through this ceremony, good vibes and blessings for a successful and happy marriage are transferred into the rings.
Jumping Over the Broom
Inspired by African-American and Afro-Caribbean traditions, this is an old practice for couples who want to commit themselves fully to their marriage journey together. As per tradition, couples must jump over the broomstick hand-in-hand three times.
The jumping of the broom symbolizes the couple’s entrance into a new phase of life. This act, often performed at the end of the ceremony, represents sweeping away the old and welcoming the new.
It also signifies their vows being sealed ’till death do them part.
The Unity Candle Ceremony
The Unity Candle Ceremony is a more contemporary tradition in South African weddings, signifying the union of two lives into one. Holding lighted candles in each hand, the pair unites their flames to light a third candle, signifying their common journey.
Ulwaluko and Umabo
This is a private ceremony in which the groom is celebrated for becoming a Xhosa initiate, which marks his transition from childhood into adulthood. There is a similar celebration held for young women who are marking their cultural transition into adulthood ahead of their wedding.
Breaking the Kola Nut
Among some South African communities, breaking the kola nut is a customary ritual during the wedding ceremony. The kola nut, a symbol of unity, respect, and hospitality, is broken by the bride and groom, and they each take a piece and exchange it.
In certain South African communities, the bride presents kola nuts to her in-laws as a gesture of goodwill and acceptance.
This act represents their commitment to sharing and supporting each other throughout their marriage. The act symbolizes the beginning of a harmonious relationship between the families.
Umabo Wama Kwinkwinana
The Umabo Wama Kwinkwinana is a celebration involving music and dancing. It honors other young men who have recently gone through their initiation process.
Traditional South African Wedding Reception
Wedding receptions in South Africa are known for their vibrant and energetic dance performances and colorful celebrations you can experience.
Mostly appreciated by a variety of guests—couples typically invite an abundance of guests from both sides. The bride’s side usually includes her parents, siblings (if any), grandparents, godparents, and close relatives. The groom’s side would similarly consist of his parents, siblings (if any), grandparents, and close relatives/friends as well.
Additionally, many couples also invite their closest friends to be part of the wedding party.
More traditional South African weddings may also include additional attendees such as stepsiblings or extended family members like aunts and uncles. Contrarily, modern weddings tend to stick with just immediate family members plus friends that hold special significance in the couple’s life story together. This tradition is done out of respect for everyone involved; it ensures that only those who have had a hand in developing the relationship over time are allowed entrance into one’s inner circle on this special day!
Bambatha
Married couples bless the newlyweds during the reception by doing the Bambatha, also called the Babbatha. For those who have been married for some time, it is a lovely way to commemorate both the happy couple’s relationship and their own.
South African Traditional Wedding Songs
A wedding celebration is not complete without music, but most of the songs are reserved for the reception when the newlyweds can dance with their loved ones. It is suggested that everyone give the newlyweds a leg shake dance move.
Dance of Love
The ‘dance of love’ is a famous tradition where the newlyweds showcase their love and commitment through dance. Guests join in, celebrating the couple’s union by showcasing their dance skills. This tradition highlights the importance of celebrating love and togetherness.
Gumboot Dancing
From traditional Zulu songs to modern South African hip hop, Anderson says guests at a South African wedding can expect an amazing mix of music and dance. “One of the mainstays of South Africa’s wedding culture is gumboot dancing,” he says, adding that this style originated in the gold mines during Apartheid, as workers were forbidden from talking and singing while working, so they invented their own language through foot stamping and stick beating—which eventually evolved into this unique form of rhythmic dance.”
Marabi Music
In the early 20th century, this kind of music gained popularity. According to Anderson, it is an urbanized take on jazz that “fuses genres from around Africa, such as Calypso beats with strong impactful rhythms.”
Zulu Dancing
As for that Zulu dancing Anderson mentioned earlier, he says it’s a great thing to witness during any celebration. Dancers start off by gathering around in a circle before joining hands and beginning to move along in steady circles or lines chanting traditional spiritual songs for hours on end. “The bride-to-be will often have her friends join her during the ceremony but it’s not uncommon for strangers or even unexpected guests to join in too.”
Pantsula and Kwela Dancing
Less common is Pantsula dancing, which Anderson explains usually consists of men who hit their knees against each other while synchronizing eye movements and telling funny jokes between themselves as they go along. There’s also Kwela, which Anderson says is known as Quick Step dancing. This involves lighthearted humor alongside intricate footwork. “These dances often accompany nighttime skateboarding competitions at parties or simphisas (weddings).”
South African Traditional Wedding Attire: for the Couple
When it comes to clothing, traditional South African wedding attire serves as a vibrant expression of culture and traditions, with bridesmaids normally donning colorful fabrics like silk or satin and accessorize with gold jewelry.
Some brides opt for a full-length white dress with intricate beading or lace detailing. Along with the dress, traditional headwear is common—like an ivory veil with gold accents for the bride and a black cap for the groom.
Other brides may lean more traditionally, and wear brightly colored fabrics known as Shweshwe, according to Sitar.
When the brides don Shweshwe, the grooms will wear either a suit or traditional garments like boubous with accessories like beads and hats. Otherwise, you can expect to see grooms wearing three-piece suits that are often tailored in bold colors such as navy blue, burgundy, or black.
South African Traditional Wedding Attire for Guests and Ushers
Those who have been invited to bear witness to the nuptials are asked to dress formally but may choose whatever color they prefer, Sitar says, adding that there’s no specific hue required of guests.
“The attendants (ushers) can also choose from traditional outfits like dashikis paired with matching trousers or kaftans paired with matching slacks to highlight their cultural heritage while looking sharp,” John Anderson says.
South African Traditional Wedding Food, Drinks and Desserts
Traditional South African receptions are incomplete without food and beverages, along with the indispensable wedding cake. Delectable dining selections will be abundant, including a variety of sweets.
South African Wedding Food
The food and cake at a South African wedding are always amazing, according to Anderson, and many weddings will feature traditional dishes such as sosaties (cubes of meat marinated in sweet-and-sour chili sauce, skewered onto strips of sour fig leaves), umphokoqo (a coarse mealie pap made from maize) and potjiekos (“pot food” featuring a variety of meats cooked slowly with vegetables).
“The star dish for many South African weddings is bobotie, a delicious blend of ground beef mixed with onions, apricots and nuts before being baked with an egg custard. It’s so popular that it even has its own festival each year in the city of Grahamstown!”
South African Wedding Desserts
You can’t have a wedding without the cake, and Anderson said the sweet wedding day treat is commonly served alongside other dessert options, that include freshly baked cakes stuffed with caramel or fruit-flavors like banana or pineapple.
“Traditional wedding cakes often feature multi-tiered layers adorned with delicate decorations like ivory roses or sugar lace,” he continues. “You can also find cupcakes topped with cream cheese frosting which guests love to devour after dinner.” Sitar says guests will also have the option to nosh on dried fruits covered in marzipan icing, yum.
South African Postwedding Traditions
The fun doesn’t stop when the wedding day is over. “The day after or two days after the wedding is typically reserved for more partying at what’s known as ‘Wedzamashele,'” explains Anderson. “All friends and family gather again, but this time it’s mainly focused on celebrating the newly married couple with games like stealing money from the bride and groom’s pockets without them noticing.”
Traditional South African weddings also typically feature a day of singing and dancing as well. “During this event, men will normally donate money to help create a fund for new home purchase or any other needs that may arise following marriage such as school fees for kids.”
“Post wedding traditions vary depending on region however common ones include Umembeso, where female relatives give gifts such as clothing or jewelry as a congratulatory gesture towards newly married couples, as well as Dowry Presentations were senior male family members present cattle or other livestock in recognition of their union,” adds Sitar.
The Crossing of the Threshold
In many South African weddings, particularly among the Sotho and Tswana communities, the crossing of the threshold is a symbolic moment. As the newlyweds enter their marital home for the first time, the bride is traditionally carried over the threshold by the groom. Per news18, this act symbolizes the protection and support the husband will provide throughout their married life. It is believed that carrying the bride over the threshold ensures good fortune and wards off evil spirits.
Traditional South African Wedding Gifts
A blanket is a significant customary present given during South African weddings. It is customary for couples getting married to give out blankets, either made of wool or cotton fabric adorned in different designs depending on what part of South Africa they come from. This blanket gift-giving custom dates back centuries ago when blankets were considered treasured items due to their ability to ward off cold weather during winter times and provide warmth in other circumstances. This way, guests will have a memento to remember this special day for years to come.
Some couples will set up a “blessing box” during the reception where visitors can place cards with advice and cash contributions for the couple’s future together. Couples also typically receive more conventional gifts like towels, bedding sets, and kitchen appliances. It is also typical for extended family members such as grandparents and godparents to give gifts during this time too; usually money so they can help get things started right in terms of wealth and security.
Conclusion
Weddings in South Africa are a living example of the timeless beauty of tradition and the adaption of customs to modern life. Choosing South Africa as your wedding location entails embracing a diverse range of cultures since each custom gives a deeper meaning to the occasion. An immersive experience, a voyage through time and culture, and a celebration of unity that knows no boundaries are created at a South African wedding by combining traditional rituals with modern embellishments that represent the changing nature of love.
